boredom is the catalyst of creation

so I've been sitting around these past couple of nights with nothing to do since my homework is realitively light, well at least its lighter than what it was in architecture, (ID is a peach) anyways I've been fidling around in 3d Max and made this creation


Just a little bike that I'll be using in the first animated adventure of Samuri Smiley.

Yesterday I was a total retard and missed my design class because I slept in. It was so stupid cuz I had totally done all the work and more and was excited to present and everything, but no, my lazy ass has to sleep in till 11:30 after deciding at 8:00 that "another 30 minutes will be ok" so now I've got to find my professors email and send a letter of apology. Fuck my ass I don't want to be doing stupid things like this again this semester.

still working on one or all of those goals from earlier...

reinventing reinvention

Often times I take a step back from myself and try to decide if I like where I'm going. If I don't like it I say I'm going to reinvent myself and become something I like. Up until now its been met with about a week of reinvention followed by a gradual return to the old me. So I guess that means I've got to reinvent the ways I've been reinventing myself. What does that mean you ask? It means I've been going about it all wrong. I used to give myself a reward system but then would always reward myself without doing anything because I rock and thats reason enough to reward myself. So that doesn't work.

Right now I'm in the middle of reinventing reinventing myself. I'm going to classes, doing the homework on time, and still setting aside time for me to just sit back and enjoy being me. I'm getting back to my roots of punk/alternative rock, and also I'm painting again which I always love.

So why am I still here feeling like somethings missing?

first weeks

today marks the end of the first week of my third year in college. It wasn't a whole weeks cuz I was away for my sisters wedding which was bitchin'. Anywho, It went as good as any of my first weeks of school have gone I guess. After 4 long months I've been able to hang out with one of my best friends and that makes me happy. But for some reason I find myself just wanting to wallow by myself here in my hermit hole. hopefully this feeling goes away, I think its just a product of me being single for way way way too long. That means its time to lower my standards, like so low they're just this side of unbearable. Also I'm spending too much money. Saving is not a talent that I have mastered yet and its about time I start. Too bad I've got a ton of bills to pay and things that I NEED to buy in order to survive. But what can you do.

Goals for this semester

- less than 3 absences in my classes

- good grades so I bring my gpa back up

- wake up and be on time for all my morning classes

- find a girlfriend

-cure cancer